The Forgotten Past

I decided to write about my experiences in college 10 days after AusMat prom concluded. I do not know why I took so long to write but it always my intention to write about AusMat.  Prom 2017 is pretty much the same except the fact that I did not spend most of my time hiding in the washroom instead it was one of my friends. This time I got a date to bring to prom although I do not see why she would want to date me considering all of my shortcomings. Like last year, prom this year gave me mixed feelings. I was happy to get out of the shithole, sad to leave the beginning of a strong friendship bond, excited for the next stage of my life and disappointed my dark thoughts are still with me even after another year had passed by. So let me begin at the first day of college. Wait. No. Let me take you further back. Let me take you back to the time when I thought high school is going to be the death of me. Let me take you back to the time when high school reminded me of bad memories and...

Every time I begin a story, I usually start with the title because it reminds me of what I should write. But, today I'm writing about you. I procrastinated long enough. Every time I try to put pen to paper, I got overwhelmed with emotions. Memories flood back like a broken dam. I have to tread carefully on this one because you are the story of all my other stories, the one I revolves around and the one I wished did not end.  It has to be my masterpiece, not one I will read again and again but one that can fully shows how I feel these 6 years. Now, how do I begin? There are so many things to describe you and the way we meet but there is no way to say it without it sounding like a cliché from a book. I could tell you stories about football, my passion and how my day is going on but when it comes to you, I have no words. I just want to get out the entire cliché before I go any further. Yes, she is pretty and yes she is intelligent and has a smile that melts me. Yes she did ...

One lazy afternoon, I sat down and realized I am only 5 months or so away from graduation and I cannot decide what to feel. Do I feel sad or do I feel happy? What is graduation anyway? I remember at the start of my final school year, I walked into school realizing I am a senior now and that thought somehow does not intrigue me even though there was so much hype being a senior.             A little more than 4 years ago, I was in school looking at my crush and wondering how long would I like this girl for. At that time, we liked to prank each other by untying his or her shoelaces when one is not looking. I imagined myself playing this prank on her in our senior year. I did ask myself how long will these crushes last and will I ever remember this memory. Turns out I do. However it is not a sweet one. I had a crush on her for 2 or 3 years and then I ignored her for the rest of the school years. It was silly thinking back because ...

Why is it that you have no emotion? How do you keep yourself in motion? What do you do to keep living life? Why do you start talking with the cuts from your knife? You say you do not feel joy Yet you play like a toy You say everything is a trick Yet you never get pricked You say you do not feel sorrow Yet you act like there is no tomorrow You say you do not fear tears Yet you never once shed one You say you do not feel pain Yet your wrists have blood stains You told me to not worry Yet you never told me your story Why is it that you have no emotion? How do you keep yourself in motion? What do you do to keep living life? Why do you start talking with the cuts from your knife?

               Are you always the friend that never got called to a gathering? Are you the friend that have to walk behind when the walkway is not wide enough? Are you the one that got belittle by each and every of the member in the gang and no one is there to stand up for you so you just have to laugh along. Are your messages got ignored in the Whatsapp group chat? Do any of your friends ever listen to your stories, your ideas or even your pain? Can you recount the times your friends actually sat with you during recess? No? You must be a lucky person. Now, relax and let me tell you the story of a friend that doesn’t have any friend.                 His name was Tre Lee. He was a happy boy. Born in Malaysia, his family together with him moved to Australia when he was 2 so that his father could work in his new company. Every day, his father makes sure Tre does not forge...

Him I’m halfway to the bathroom when my alarm started ringing. I left it ringing because I'm too lazy to walk back and turn it off. Another day of waking early for school in where I'm going to do nothing. I turned on the bathroom light and tried to compromise with myself on how shit this day going to be.                 I almost forgot to introduce myself. My name is Way, going to be 16 this July and hell, my life is great. Being an alpha male when around my friends bring extra confidence in you and everyone just wants to know you. Having girls to ask for your number or boys to ask you to join their football team is almost a daily routine. Of course I play hard to get. So far, I have been in no relationship cause no girl is up to my standard. But, you know how puberty works. Here and then, I go gaga over celebrities.               ...